Family – PJ's Monday Musings

5 things you need when life goes sideways

Last week, life went sideways at our house…

On Thursday night, our 16-year old son was diagnosed with diabetes, which set off an unexpected domino of events that included two ER visits and a hospital stay in the span of three days.

“Normal” is a thing of the past for us now…but really we’re just a little ahead of the curve as we all adjust to the “new normal” ahead of us in a post-pandemic world.

Life has gone sideways for many of us for different reasons, and it will continue to go sideways as long as we live in a world broken by sin.

So, I started thinking…

(Actually, if I’m honest, I went into survival mode.)

What did I need to get through the last several days?

Really, what do we all need when life goes sideways?

I’m sure the list could be longer…even should be longer. But, I’m keeping it to five today, and I hope that these five things will help/encourage you the next time your life goes sideways.

Number one: You need to remember that the LORD is your strength.

The Bible is literally full of verses that remind us of this, but today I stumbled on this one…

“Praise the LORD! For he has heard my cry for mercy. The LORD is my strength and shield. I trust him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving.” (Psalm 28:6-7)

Number two: You need to remember that the LORD’s mercies are new every morning.

In other words, every day you get a full helping of God’s mercy…and He’s not stingy with it.

“The faithful love of the LORD never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.” (Lamentations 3:22-23)

Number three: You need to remember that God’s grace is sufficient for whatever it is that you are going through.

The important thing to remember here is that you are not sufficient, but God is. And, he’s not stingy with his grace either.

“My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” – the LORD speaking to Paul in 2 Corinthians 12:9

Number four: You need to remember that the trials we go through are meant to make us stronger, not weaker (see number three).

The trials we go through are part of living in a broken world…yes. But they are not purposeless or even necessarily punishment for sin. In fact, we need trials to make us stronger in our faith and in our dependence on God.

“…when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.” (James 1:2-4)

Number five: You need to remember that you are not meant to go through life’s challenges alone.

When life goes sideways, you need people in your life to mourn with you, comfort you, encourage you, and just be there for you. It’s no wonder that the Bible is full of verses that talk about caring for one another.

“God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-4)

Like I said, this list could go on and on and on. But, I’ll stop at five.

As I think back on the last several days, I am thankful…

…that the LORD has been my strength,

…that I’ve woken up every day to a full helping of his mercy,

…that his grace is sufficient for whatever the “new normal” is going to be,

…that this trial is helping me depend more on him every day,

…and that my family has been surrounded by so many people who have loved and encouraged us as our life went sideways.

Thanksgiving…holiday or habit?

I love Thanksgiving…

I love the food.

I love the family and friends.

I love the football.

I love it all.

(In fact, it may even be my favorite holiday, because I just love that combination of food, family & friends, and football all in one day.)

But, it’s just one day.

Imagine if we were only thankful one day a year.

Maybe that sounds crazy, but how often do we actually celebrate what we’re thankful for the other 364 days of the year?

Is thanksgiving more of a holiday or a habit for you?

Is it something that you celebrate every day or only on special occasions?

Do you need a reason to be thankful every day or do you choose to be thankful even on your worst of days?

Are you teaching and modeling every day thanksgiving to those around you, or do they see you living in a perpetual cycle of discontent?

Thanksgiving isn’t just a once-a-year holiday.

It’s an every day choice.

And, when we choose to be thankful every day, those choices turn into a habit.

Don’t let Thanksgiving be just a holiday for you this year. Let it become a habit that you celebrate every day.

Let it become a habit that keeps pointing you (and those who are watching you) to Jesus.

Let it become such a part of our every day lives that the generations that follow us think less of thanksgiving as a holiday and more as a way of life.

¹I will exalt you, my God and King,
    and praise your name forever and ever.
²I will praise you every day;
    yes, I will praise you forever.
³Great is the Lord! He is most worthy of praise!
    No one can measure his greatness.

⁴Let each generation tell its children of your mighty acts;

(Psalm 145:1-4)

¹⁶Always be joyful. ¹⁷Never stop praying. ¹⁸Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.

(1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)

The kids are watching you… always watching

Anyone who has seen the movie Monster’s Inc. knows the classic line spoken by Roz to Mike Wazowski…

“I’m watching you, Wazowski! Always watching…”

Mike doesn’t really like to hear that, because you get the impression from Roz’s character that she really is watching him ALL THE TIME.

And there’s some pressure and responsibility that go along with that. There’s a lot at stake for Mike knowing that Roz is always watching.

If you are a parent or youth worker, you have little “Rozs” watching you ALL THE TIME.

And, just like with Mike, there’s a lot at stake (for them and for you).

Because the kids are watching you to see what following Jesus really looks like in a Christian culture that makes a lot of things gray.

And, what we make gray today will only get grayer for the next generation.

Here’s what I mean…

Parents (and youth workers) remember… your kids are watching you, always watching.

And, the decisions you make about things like church, entertainment, alcohol, and social media are going to have an impact on your kids whether you realize it or not.

If church attendance/participation is optional or sporadic in your family now, your kids will take it another degree or two further, and will find more excuses/reasons not to go when they are older.

If your entertainment choices are dictated more by what the culture thinks is a “good” movie or album to listen to (and less about what the Bible says is “good”), where do you think your kids will look for what is “good” when they have more freedom to make those choices?

If your approach to alcohol is casual, don’t assume that your kids will know what “casual” means or that they will have the same ability/desire to make alcohol just another element of their social lives when they get older.

If social media is a place where you vent, rant, overshare, misrepresent yourself, or spend too much time on, know that your kids are taking cues from you on things like: where their value and identity comes from, how to communicate, and how to deal with conflict (not to mention how to manage their time).

The truth is our kids will generally take the things they see in us and take them one or two (or even three) degrees further.

The gray only gets more gray…not less.

And, believe me, they are watching you.

Always watching.

Failing is an earth thing…and why that should give you hope

We all want hope.

We all want a reason to get out of bed in the morning.

And so we go searching for it…

We go to work hoping that we’ll like our jobs and make enough money to be comfortable.

We go to school hoping that someday all those classes will lead to a job that we’ll like and make us enough money to be comfortable.

We play sports hoping that someday we’ll get paid to play a sport we love and make us more than enough money to be comfortable.

We make friends hoping that someday we’ll find the one that we’ll spend the rest of our comfortable lives with on this earth.

But, then things go sideways.

We don’t like our jobs, or we can never seem to make enough money.

We don’t like school.

We love the sports we play, but our bodies fail us.

And, we just can’t seem to find the one.

Deep down, we ask ourselves, where can I find hope?

Because failing seems to be a big part of this world that we live in.

But, here’s where it actually gets better.

Yes, failing is an earth thing. Failing is part of living in a broken world.

But God is not of this world.

And, because God is not of this world, He doesn’t fail. (Hebrews 13:5)

We live in a world where people are searching for hope in places that ultimately fail them…work, education, money, relationships, and the list goes on.

The good news is that real, lasting, get-out-of-bed-everyday hope doesn’t fail…and it’s found in a personal relationship with God.

This is the hope we all want.

This is the hope this failing world needs.

This is really good news.

The question is…are you ready to share it?

If someone asks you today what is it about believing in Jesus that gives you hope, what would you say?

“I will never forget this awful time…
²¹Yet I still dare to hope
when I remember this:

²²The faithful love of the Lord never ends!^[b]
    His mercies never cease.
²³Great is his faithfulness;
    his mercies begin afresh each morning.
²⁴I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance;
    therefore, I will hope in him!” (Lamentations 3:20-24)

“…if someone asks about your hope as a believer, always be ready to explain it.” (1 Peter 3:15b)